Monday 6 January 2014

Scene #4.2

Ubonisa noMpumezo sele bese town, kaloku bebethembisene ngokuya kuphola bobabini qha kwii ndawo zophola. Bazihlelele bobabini, kodwa sikhona isininzi esihamba hambayo apho, sikwakhona nesihleliyo, abanye bakwazilele, abanye bazihlelele ezitulweni. 

Bonisa: “Eish, kuphole kamnandi ke phantsi kwalemithi”
Mpumezo: “Ewe maaarn”
Bonisa: “Kuthwa yintoni kanene xa ibizwa”
Mpumezo: “company gardens nana”
Bonisa: “Oh jaaaa”
Mpumezo: “So, tell me uziva njani?”
Bonisa: “Kamnandi kakhulu! It freels great to get out of the community ke tana”
Mpumezo: “ I am glad ke nana”
Bonisa: “Thanks for taking me out, I mean, I needed this ke yazi”
Mpumezo: “Nha! Don't even mention it babe”
Bonisa: “Ndicela ulale ngomqolo ke ndiqamelele apha phezu kwakho”
Mpumezo: “Ok”
Bonisa: “Akubonakali nesibhakabhaka ke yazi”
Mpumezo: “Mmmhm”
Bonisa: “Kwanalemithi mide sana”
Mpumezo: “Mhmhm”
Bonisa: “Yintoni na wena suke wammmhhmmmza nha?”
Mpumezo: “Ha! Ha! Ha! Uthi ndithini?”
Bonisa: “Yewethu! Yintoni uzithwisha nha? Unerhwayibhani? Oko uzikrwempa mntaka bawo oko sisiza”
Mpumezo: “Hay'maarn! Akhonto! Bendichanyelwe nguntwana wapha enext door ngoku ndatshintsha nje ibhlukhwe ngoku ndiza kuwe, andabi sahlamba. Kaloku bendingafuni ukukulibazisa nana”
Bonisa: “Phofu ke uyaluma nyhani umchamo womntwana”
Mpumezo: “Unditsweba kabuhlungu ke yazi”
Bonisa: “Akukho zitoilet nha apha? Uzifaka amanzi kaloku! Izophela”
Mpumezo: “Uzoba right wena kuqala? Ungalali ke, ababherhi bazokuba bemke nawe ke! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
Bonisa: “Khawuleza kaloku nawe ze ndibiwe bubuthongo ube ulalapha nawe”

Mmmmmm! Ncncncncncncn! Lomfo unyamezele ntoni kanye? Uhlobo awayesele ehamba kabuhlungu ngalo ngoku nkosi yam. Wayede wazithi qhutsu iimpundu ezi, ezinyusele phezulu ingathi uhamba ngeenzwane. Enkalasa ukuhamba oku ingathi sisidudla esimithiyo. Emana ukutsala izip le yebhrukhwe ukuze ingathi nca apha eentlantini zamaQwathi. Ukuhamba oku inga ngumntu obala iiAkile zentsimi yakokwabo. Unyuse amagxa unkabi inga ufuna ukuzenza mde ngenkani.

Ekufikeni kwakhe etoilet, wakha amanzi nge empty lejusi. Wangena kwigumbi lokuzinceda, wakhulula. Wasineka akubona umonakalo osele ukhona ngoku. Mamela ndikuxelele, ukuba uzakonyanya hay ndicela uxolo kodwa mamela.

Amaqanda akhe obudoda ayesele ebhlasile ngoku, makube yiyo lento unkabi ankalasayo ukuhamba oku. Eli lingasekhohlo, lalisele lileqa iqanda lekwalikwini ubukhulu obu balo. Lide liyashayna. Kwakusele kubonakala kwa imingxunyana le ibalapha esikhumbeni, ide yazobeka ubukhulu obu bayo. Ibhikini le yakhe, yayinkone bubofu, incangathi yincindi ephuma pha ebudodeni bakhe. Kwakulibala nje eliyelo, elibawuni, elimnyama, kukho ke nezikhoko zokuncamathela kwesikhini kumQwathi. 

Suke wantshwenya umqwathi ngoku, washwabana ngathi uyagodola. Kwaye phofu kwakungabandi tu ukuze abe uyagodola unkabi landlela waye eyiyo. Ide ingathi uyaphefumla ngoku naye. 

UMpumezo, wathath lamanzi akwela empty, ne toilet paper, wamane encinda, esosula, encinda ekhama, encinda ehlikihla, encinda, emanzisa esenza loomcoco wento engaziwayo. Uke wanexesha lokuzama ukufaka inatsika yakhe ebhotileni ukuze isele amanzi nayo, mhlawumbi ingaphola. Wakhulula isikhindi sakhe, wasifaka emgqomeni wokulahla amaphepha, ze wathatha itoilet paper eninzi, wathandela ngayo umqwathi ogodolayo, ze wanxiba.

Kuyo yonke lento, umfo wayemana ehlihliza, encinciza eqhashumba kunzima kuye.

Wade wanxiba naye, wabuyela apho ashiye khona intombi yakhe. Wayechula ngoku ucofa iphone ke xa efika kuthembela, ibe ngathi akayiboni kakuhle lento ayenzayo ze acothisise ukuze ingaqatshelwa lula lemeko akuyo. Wafika naye wangqengqa apha ecaleni kukaBonisa ngomqolo. Waqonda mhlophe ukuba akanakukwazi ukungqengqa ngesisu ntanga, kunganyiwa kaloku.

Bonisa: “Ndicela uqamelela ngawe wethu Mpumie, ndonqena ingcole intloko yam”

Akazange alindele mpendulo ke uBonisa. Wayithi qethu intloko yakhe, ke wayidlikidla ukuze kusuke emdaka into ekuyo. Thixa ngoko nangoko esineneni sikaMpumezo loontlokokazi yakhe inkulu. Kanti ngelishwa uyibele phezu kukamqwathi oleliswe ecaleni kakuhle inga ulele esibhedlele kwibhedi yezigulane.

Waaqhashumba uDikela kaNoni, uNtsway'bane mfondini wakhala isikhalo esitswinayo, kwek, kwaabheka wonke umntu okufutshane maaarn! Bonke gqi ngendoda epenapenayo sele ide ilele ngecala mfondini.

Bonisa: “Shuuu! Uxolo! Yhu! Uxolo kaloku! Oh yhini shame!”

Kwekhu, yintoni na le imehlelayo ngoku uMpumezo, wacinga ngaphakathi kanye lomagama xa kwakufika oonogada phezu kwakhe. 

Security guard: “Yintoni eqhubekayo apha”
Bonisa: “Hay akukho nto bhuti!”
Security Guard: “Ingxolo le yeyantoni ke sisi? Bhuti yintoni?”
Bonisa: “Lento injena wena bhuti, ndingqube pha emazantsi nge misteke, ngoku caba ndimlimazile”
Security Gaurd: “Oh! Ngoku yintoni ude ukhale kangaka mfo? Uchukumise ityiphi zilele usisiza nha? Lento ude ukhale kangaka? Lonto ude uphuma neenyembezi”
Bonisa: “Hay'bo uyakhala? Yho! Uxolo! Mpumie! Uxolo torho! Yho! Andisenawari ke ngoku” 

Waaphakama ngoku uMpumezo sele ezivuthulula, engatyhilekanga kwasebusweni ngoku.

Mpumezo: “Ndicela sigoduke mfondini”
Bonisa: “Hay'bo! Ngoku sisanda kufika love? Hay'bo! Cela torho!”
Mpumezo: “Masambe khazi! Kumele siye ententeni late”
Bonisa: “Andifuni kuya ntenteni mna! Andifuni kuya ekhaya futhi! Ndifuna ukuya kwakho!”
Mpumezo: “Huh? Uthini?
Bonisa: “Uve ndawoni wena?”
Mpumezo: “Awuzukwazi ukuya kwam”
Bonisa: “Andikubuzi kaloku nje”
Mpumezo: “Huh?”
Bonisa: “Use wasisithulu mva nje! Ndiyakuxelela kaloku ukuba, namhlanje, awuyi ententeni, and ndizolala kwakho namhlanje”

Sime kanye xa kulapho ke nto zobawo. Kwixa elizayo.

#DOUO

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