Thursday 19 December 2013

Scene #3.18

UMpumezo uncokola kuWhatsapp noBonisa.

Bonisa: (Whatsapp) “Yaphelela phi eyokhupha mna ke bhuti”
Mpumezo: “Ngomso love sizoya apho ufuna khona”
Bonisa: “Ubuthe izolo elinye ke”
Mpumezo: “I know, suwara babe! Tomorrow ndim nawe qha”
Bonisa: “Yhehake”
Mpumezo: “Nyhan jo! Ndingowakho ngomso 24/7”
Bonisa: “Ohk ke”
Mpumezo: “Uziva njani namhlanje love”
Bonisa: “Ndiryt qha andikafuni ujongana nabantu”
Mpumezo: “Ohk”
Bonisa: “Ndizivalela ngendlu! Kodwa zoqala uphangela ngomso”
Mpumezo: “Its a start, welcome back”
Bonisa: “Entwenini ke ngoku?”
Mpumezo: “Kaloku, esi sisiqalo sokuphuma kwakho kulomqolomba ukuwo, uzakude udibane nabantu, lento yale vido izode inyamalale tu. Ndivuyiswa nje nayilento ubuyela emsebenzini. Intle lonto'
Bonisa: “Yazi nguwe wedwa umntu ondikhathaleyo ke sana, wonke omnye umntu undibona ubuDevil Worshipper, nomama umfundisi wakho undibona ubugqwirha”
Mpumezo: “Yho! Ewe nhe?”
Bonisa: “Ndiva namarhe okuba ufuna ndigxothwe ecaweni ngenxa yalevido and to be honest, I know who did le vido. Ndimbekele umbeko yena shame”
Mpumezo: “Ngubani yena lowo?”
Bonisa: “Uyamazi uNolitha wakoo12 pha kweza flet zingaseBhekela?”
Mpumezo: “Ndazi lo ubhityileyo utshaya gqthi intsango mna”
Bonisa: “Ha.a! Hasuka! Myeke lowo, akamdaka ke lonto lowo! Ukhona omnye, unesiqwana kodwa yena. Uthanda poster pha kwiGROUP yeJokes, “LMFAO”
Mpumezo: “Ewe, ndiyambona nalowo! Usile ke khona! Utheni”
Bonisa: “Ujola noSityhilelo, lo ndilala naye kulavido”
Mpumezo: “Ngokyu?”
Bonisa: “Kaloku ndafumana iklatshi naye, so, ndayiwina emva kokuba ndimnyisile. Kanti yena washeka esenza ivido ngoku sityanayo”
Mpumezo: “Akangcole ke love”
Bonisa: “Ikhona nje into ezayo kuye wena! Myekele kum”
Mpumezo: “Kodwa uyayenza into yakho kuvido babes andinamona”
Bonisa: “MxM! Wes ke sana ndandingamva naloSityhilelo”
Mpumezo: “Haaaaaaa!”

Waye esemaSomaliyeni uMpumezo ngelixesha athethe noBonisa. Eyozithengela ubuntwana-ntwana nje obuncinane. Kwangena uCeliwe naye ezozithengela umoya.

Somalia: “Azikho iqanda bhuti”
Mpumezo: “Kukho ntoni ke?”
Somaliya: “Zifrench ikhona”
Mpumezo: “Ungayibambi ngesandla ke my friend”
Somalia: “Ikhona ezinye?”
Mpumezo: “Sapha nechips ze 50c kwedin”
Somalia: “Amvovo?”
Mpumezo: “Ewe! Unike nalosisi! Ufuna ezantoni nana?”
Celiwe: “Enkosi bhuti! AweBBQ my friend”
Somalia: “Iwena! Ha.a! Errr! Ithanda imfazi wena!”
Mpumezo: “Hay! Hay! Hay! Yintoni le uyithethayo ngoku kwedini?”
Somalia: “Ha! Ha! Ha! Wena! Ayikh right wena! Ithanda kakhulu inthombhi wena!”
Celiwe: “Caba udume ngothanda amacherie jo nhe?”
Mpumezo: “Nha! Iyageza lentwana. Andinamntu mna jo”
Celiwe: “Hasuka! Uvela phi ndiye?”
Mpumezo: “Serious! Andixoki”
Celiwe: “Ok ke xa usitsho. Enkosi ngee chips, see you”
Mpumezo: “So, andivufumana nokuba ligama lakho ke ngoku?”
Celiwe: “Celiwe bhuti”
Mpumezo: “Waze wanegama elimnandi nkosazana”
Celiwe: “Ndiyayazi lonto bhuti! Enkosi!”
Mpumezo: “Mamela ke nana! Ndicela oku kwamanani akho maaarn”
Celiwe: “Uzowenzani kanene wona bhuti? Iaitime yeR10 my friend nechocolate, islap”
Mpumezo: “Ndingathanda ukumane ndikufowunela! Umhle kakhulu maarn”
Somalia: “Ishota R3.50”
Celiwe: “Andinayo nje my friend, please cela undinike zokuyibhatala”
Somalia: “Ayikho bhatala wena! I know you! Ayikho mali bhatala wena”
Mpumezo: “If I pay for ezi zinto zakho, will you give me your number babe?”
Celiwe: “Nha enkosi! Cela undiphe nje le R3.50 ishotayo”
Mpumezo: “No! I insist! Let me pay for you, and wena undinike nje oku kwenumber yakho”
Celiwe: “If you insist ke bhuti! Sapha iR20 yam ke my friend, please”

Wakhupha iR50 uMpumezo, abhatala. UCeliwe yena ucula lamanani akhe, umfo yena wabe ebhala kwiphone yakhe, ukugqiba kwakhe, wayifowunela le kaCeliwe, yatsho.

Mpumezo: “Yeyam ke leyo! Ndingakufowunela nini ke nana?”
Celiwe: “Nanini ufuna! Xa ingabanjwa ke uyazi ukuba ndibhizi! Enkosi ngokundibhatalela kwakhona”
Mpumezo: “Ingxaki umhle kakhulu jo”
Celiwe: “Ndibhale bani ke igama? Akhange undixelele! Enkosi kodwa ndiyazazi ukuba ndimhle ke nam”
Mpumezo: “Mpumie! Bhala Mpumie! Okanye ungalibhala neliphi nha igama olifunayo”
Celiwe: “ha! Ha! Ha! Funny! Ok ke bhuti Mpumie!”

Bagqibile ukuthenga. Bakhuphana phandle ukuya ngasendleleni, umntu ephethe pwakhe umgodlo.

Mpumezo: “Andizukuhlatywa xa ndikufowunela nana?”
Celiwe: “Ngubani kanene?”

Bohlukana ke kodwa umntu ngamnye wajonga kwelakhe icala. Umfo lo waye engangxama ezithele chu kuhle, efake iiearphones edlala umculo wevangeli, esacofa-cofa iphone ke phofu, kaloku ooko ebekuWhatsapp unkabi, encokola noBonisa ixesha eli lonke. Kwakho lamama wasebumelwaneni ummisayo ukuba athethe naye.

Mama: “Zeke nimise intente nakwesi sethi isitrato kaloku mpumezo mntanam, nishumayeze olu lutsha izwi. Ke lubone apha kuni mntam ukuba intsindiso le iyaphilwa! Ke luyeke ezi zinto luzenzayo”
Mpumezo: “Utsho na mama”
Mama: “Ewe mntanam! Ivele ibe buhlungu ke intliziyo yam xana ndilubon alutshabalala! Kudingeka kwa nina ke nilwe losathana ubasebenzisayo. Kumele kwanina bantwana bethu abaphila intsindiso, ndimlwe losathana. Kaloku, kwanina, xana nikwazi ukuma phambi kwabo nime, nisithi umfana uyakwazi ukuphila ubungcwele, umfana uyakwazi ukuphila engajoli, umfana uyakwazi ukuphila ngaphandle kwentombazana, aphile de futhi ayotshata. Lonto abafani maaarn bona tu nani, nina niphila ubungcwele, niphilela uYesu. Zamani maaarn”
Mpumezo: “Ndiyakuva mama! Kwek kumnandi ke khona ukuphilela uYesu! Uphile futhi phakathi kwezinto, sele usathana ekuzama ukukuthwebula kodwa ngamandla kamdali, ulwe ungagungqi tu. Sizakuzama mama wam”
Mama: “Sizakunithandazisa mntanam, sikhona singomama, sizakunisekela ngemithandazo nani, ukuze niwenze umsebenzi kaThixo, zilande lemfumba yabantu abatsha abazibhubhisayo. Kugcwele isifo sikagawulayo nje, kodwa abeva ukuba nali iyeza, natsi isolution, enguYesu. Kodwa bona bafuna ukufa kuqala ukuze umntu afune uyothandazelwa enkonzweni, sele efuna ukuncedwa nguYesu. Zamani mntanam! Shumayezani olulutshan luzintanga zenu”

Wayesele eme ngasegeytin kowabo umfo lo, sele engxamele ukuyotya

Sime apho okwangoku...! Siyabuya kwakhona

#DOUO

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